2016 has brought with it many clever phrases and hashtags. The ones I find the most amusing involve telling someone to shut up. “Delete your account”. “Let me tell you a little story about…NO.” “Shut up and go.””Bye Felicia!” The list goes on. Delete Your Account came from the Hillary Clinton camp to quiet Donald Trump. Simple and to the point. It’s akin to asking someone to “hold that thought…” as you walk away for an undetermined amount of time.

I’m a fan of shutting people down, especially in the vein of righteousness (albeit a subjective position). “Go to sleep” was a common go to when I was a teen. I figure it’s like turning off a computer, sometimes the arrow morphs into a circular spectrum while you’re waiting for it to get it’s shit together and the noise of being on too long doesn’t let it stop. And then peace washes over the room as the sound of internal workings is disrupted by quiet.

That’s what our relationships have to be, without the rudeness of the aforementioned statements. We all need to get quiet with ourselves and with others. We do not have the power to actually “delete” a person or their thoughts and ideas. We are not Preacher telling Eugene/Arseface to “go to hell!” and turn around in surprise to find he’s gone. Nope. Tell ’em go to hell and you know you’re in it yourself! No matter what you say to someone else, it is a reflection of the life condition you possess. The only life you can altar with conviction and clear determination is your own.

As much as you need to get something off your chest, the higher road would lead you to recognize it doesn’t matter. It’s a momentary point of pleasure but has no tangible lasting effect. What impact did your clap back provide? What foreword change has it created? In a partnership it is especially useless, that is, unless you learn a lesson from it.

Politics do not impress me much. They have very little to do with truly helping the people. The personal compromises politicians have to make in order to build a career have lasting, damaging effects. These repercussions reverberate through their own spirit and those of the people around them. “The lesser of two evils” is a common quote cited when voting for anything. It’s embarrassing. How about we stop accepting evils. Stop “using the masters tools” to throw at the problem. The master’s house, the tools used to build it and the slaves used to staff it must go.

We bring these methods of dealing with the atrocities of the world into our homes. We break down communication and develop our own nation-states founded on silence and the need to be right. It might be true that this breeds power but it doesn’t maintain it. Suppression begets an equal and opposite reaction… And that reaction isn’t unexpected. It’s unwanted. Yet, it’s necessary.

In a  relationship, a couple must see themselves as a team. In a team, each player has their strengths and weaknesses and should be utilized to the best of their abilities to ensure the entire team has a chance to win. Together. Waking up in the morning is your participation trophy, the gold medal signifies you’ve actually won. What do you win when your partner loses?

This is why it is crucial that each individual develop their own winning spirit. If each person focuses on a happiness that does no harm, their example can lead others to improve themselves. This reduces irrational fears of other people when a single person has delved deep inside their own consciousness. Maybe there would be less xenophobia. Maybe less outrage over inter-racial/inter-ethnic/cross-cultural/cross-religious/same-gender love and marriage.

Yeah, I don’t always like people, but I’m not afraid of them. If I were afraid I believe it would come from the idea that I can’t control other people’s actions and these actions may cause an upended situation with which I do not want too deal. But, hell, my brother did that our entire childhood. Improve you’re response, improve your resolve.

Now that I consider it, you have no god, no belief system, no creator or higher power if you’re afraid of people. But you’d have to read-up in order to know what you don’t know. If the things I listed above are more important than politics and people, it should hopefully teach you that politics were made by people and people are fallible beyond belief. Self-preservation is not the same as living life with purpose.

Life and death exist in a single moment. No one moment is greater than the next save to say that all moments are equally as precious. 

I may want to preserve my life but I can only control the decisions I make that enable that to happen. I cannot control the decisions and actions of others. Influence might do the trick, but that’s only possible if your life condition illustrates this potential influence.

Use your relationships to delete all unnecessary accounts, of the past, present and future. Build on love and openness, not fear. This will only strengthen your partnership and offer the children watching you a good example of triumph in the face of adversity.

You’re not going to escape the big good-bye. Whether up to you or someone or something else, you will leave this existence and go to the next ____________ (you fill in the blank). Your account will be deleted too, but before it does, what will you do?